Dearest Eliza,

When you open this letter, I may be long gone. I am truthful to my calling and my passion, I was born to be in the skies. Yet, I cannot deny that I have had my reasons to love the land. I am no stranger to the mechanisms of an airplane and I find an exhilarating rush of dopamine being thousands of feet up in the air, yet while you were beside me, I grasped my hands as a symbol of being vulnerable and with much intent; “Please, keep her safe under my wing.” As if I have not flown thousands of these with conviction, as I have wanted nothing more than to keep you safe, even at the expense of my own plummet. 

There is an entire lifetime that I look forward to: a place beyond this hemisphere. A small house with picket white fences, a dark amber wooden door with a porch and orchids on the front lawn. And you, you are in it. There is afternoon tea and bread and butter. There is music down the halls and I would take your hands. There are small gatherings from friends and evening dinners. You are in all of these. 

To this, I have a confession. Eliza, there is a spot for you, with the deepest regard, in my heart. You rest in between my cages comfortably as if you were once mine. It is hard to admit and even harder to feel. I am not quite sure this emotion is possible and I am scared of what this can mean for the both of us, especially to you. But I am about to leave, and I will not soar beyond the skies you look up to and not think of what could have been when I look down. 

There is an end to every adventure. Mine is yet to begin but I am certain of where it will end: in your arms. I will be back, my dear. And when I am drawn to the ground by gravity, the very first thing I would allow myself to pull towards is you.

Eliza... I love you. 

I love you. I love you. I love you. 

I will say it endlessly as I cross oceans, as I meet different people, as I land on different continents; my heart belongs to no other than the woman I will come home to.

As above, so below. Forever and always,

Emilia

- Allyah Jenris C. Allam

(Illustration by Miles Munich Montreal Jimenez/FEU Advocate)